Tuesday, 3 May 2016

To blog or not to blog.

WTitle says it all. As you would be currently aware I'm inpatient but I don't wish to bore you with details. Maybe another time because I'm too depressed that I've let my mum down and angered my dad and destroyed my brother. I'm a terrible daughter. But it was the only way I could keep myself safe. I'm fighting to try and live and my parents think I'm doing it for attention and that I like being in hospital. Like being in hospital!? Are you ducking kidding me I'd sooner put pins in my eyes than want to be in this pit of disaster. Plus I'm so stressed out and retarded I don't know what isn't real from reality. I'm not hearing things other than my own voice putting me down telling me the nurses hate me and I suspect are plotting against me but I'm seeing things like my blanket was breathing up and down yesterday without me touching it and so were the curtains. I thought I saw a ghost of my uncle at the end of my bed last night but he was way taller with no feet which I thought I saw my grandpa in a similar firm last year and now I feel like I'm going crazy. I am crazy. Am i? Am I not I don't know I don't know anything anymore 

So now as the day has progressed I'm going to be admitted to 4gp on Friday lucky lucky me 

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