I think I am just not meant to have friends. I prefer teddy bears anyway.
It's only nighttime as my medication is wearing off as it is time to dose up perhaps or my nocturnal thoughts consume me. I can pretend I am wise. Fake to myself that my confusing thoughts are clear. I doubt there is any benefit reading this flip flops of rubbish blog nod yet I continue to let out my mind.
Writing it down does not make me "feel" anything as such but leads me to believe it is out of mind, or at least put into a context rather then circulating.
I wish things were different.
I wish I could forget what pains me and fills me with shame.
The more I deny these facts to myself the darker I become.
I feel trapped.
I feel worthless and unwanted.
I wish someone with no unconditional love such as a family member would show me an inch of kindness so I can find hope towards the future.
Feeling about due to overdose.
No comments:
Post a comment